Alone Together
by cradleman
Summary: With the gang disbanded after college, Katie finds herself all alone. Visiting the one friend she has left in town doesn't help, and she is left looking for comfort elsewhere. She finds it in someone strange, yet also somehow familiar. *One-Shot*


_Author's Note: This story is told from the perspective of Katie. After re-watching series 3 and 4 recently, I felt like she was the only character who didn't get a proper send-off and I wanted to give her one. I've done my best to stay true to the tone of Skins, so there is strong language and some sexual references/content. The story is partially inspired by Fall Out Boy's "Alone Together" from their album Save Rock n Roll._

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters used in the story, they are the property of Brian Elsley, Jamie Brittain, and E4.

* * *

I stared at the blank walls surrounding me, looked at my bags and my few other belongings sitting forlornly in the floor. We'd moved into this flat about a week ago and I still hadn't found the motivation to unpack my shit. My thoughts drifted to Thomas, remembered the taste of his tongue. I smiled until her face appeared in my mind beside his. "Fucking hell!"

It wasn't supposed to be like this. I'm Katie fucking Fitch. I'm smart, I'm gorgeous, and I'm the popular one. So why am I sitting on a bed in a cramped flat in Bristol that my parents can barely pay for, while my sister is off gallivanting around the globe with the love of her life? I felt something running down my cheeks and realized that I had begun to cry. I tried to wipe my tears away and my hand came away black because my mascara had started to run as well. "Shit!"

This was no good. I had to talk to someone, but I wasn't sure who to turn to. I ran through a mental checklist. Thomas and Pandora were already in America, prepping for their studies. Naomi and Emily were in Brazil and most likely out having fun or . . . otherwise occupied. Effy was taking another trip to clear her head. I hadn't seen JJ much since Freddie's birthday party, the only person it seemed like he could spend time with was Lara. As for Cook . . . _Oh, god, is he really the only one left?_ "Fuck it. Maybe it'll cheer him up some."

An hour later I was sitting in a room with blank walls as people in jumpsuits walked past, none of them who I'd come to talk to. I felt like I'd been sitting down for ages when he finally appeared. As he walked into the room, his face was somber, more serious than I'd ever seen him. When he caught sight of me though, he quickly tried to mask his despair and smiled as best he could. "Katiekins! I never thought you'd pop round to see me. Haven't seen any of my mates since . . ."

"What about JJ?"

"He came round once, I guess, but it's too fucking hard for him. Seeing me makes him think of Freddie and when he thinks of Freddie he gets so fucking locked on that it's even hard for Lara to snap him out of it." Cook's smile stayed but his eyes showed the sadness in his soul.

"How many years?"

"Three. Some bullshit about breaking out of jail." He rolled his eyes. "At least my ass was covered on Foster. Freddie wasn't the first you know. He'd killed seven or eight of his patients too."

His voiced trailed off and a tear began to form at the corner of his eye. He looked away and I realized, possibly for the first time, how much Cook had loved Freddie. I reached out instinctively, covered his hand with mine. He eyed me suspiciously. "So, why you here? Shouldn't you be out fucking some random guy and having a great time instead of seeing the biggest fuck-up in the gang?"

I knew deep down that he was just spouting bullshit, trying to keep up his appearance as the guy who only thought about sex and didn't give a shit about life. It didn't matter to me though, it still fucking hurt, no matter how little he truly meant it. "You stupid motherfucker! Don't you dare!"

"Katiekins, what the hell are you talking about."

"I may not be the smartest of your friends, but I'm certainly not blind. Your best friend is gone, and getting revenge on Foster hasn't exactly brought him back from the dead. Without JJ here, you're all alone, and you might be the rest of your life."

He looked at me, his eyes opened wide. In that moment I could see straight through to his soul, and my voice softened. "I understand what you do, why you say the stupid shit you say. I know you'll never change, but you should."

"If I changed, I wouldn't be Cook."

The false bravado in his voice made me smile, though it also made me sad. "Stay out of trouble, Cookie." I leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek, prison rules be damned, and waved goodbye as I walked away. No way in hell was he going to get the last word.

As I stepped outside, I shivered. It was only August but it was already getting cold and I knew I should have brought a jacket with me. I looked at the time; it was only 7:00. I had plenty of time to walk around and think. My thoughts were jumbled together and it was hard to concentrate on one thing. I just knew that I was sad, and I wanted desperately to be happy. "I used to be number one, and now I'm just a fucking also-ran."

_Great, now I'm talking to myself too. I'm the bloody picture of mental health. _I looked up, realized I had taken the street that Effy lived on when she wasn't travelling. _Or in the loony bin._ As I passed her flat, I saw that the lights were on.

_That doesn't make any sense. With Effy and Anthea gone, this place should be as dark as a tomb._ My curiosity got the better of me and I walked up to the door. It swung open as I reached to knock. The person standing in the doorway was young, though I'd have guessed him to be a year or two older than I am. He had dark hair, and piercing blue eyes. I don't usually get tongue tied around attractive guys, but I went to talk and found that I had nothing. "I. Hi. I'm. My name is." I stopped and let out a scream of frustration. "FUCK!"

He laughed and smiled. The smile was nice and made him seem even more attractive than before, but there was something ever so subtly cruel about it too. "Hi, Fuck. You look a lot like Effy's friend Katie. I guess you could be the twin, but I'm pretty sure her name was Emily."

I found my voice and my questions tumbled out all at once. "Who the fuck are you? How the hell do you know my name? And why are you in Effy's flat?"

"Effy's my sister. I'm Tony."

"Oh my God! You got hit by a bus!"

"Why is that all that anybody ever seems to remember about me anymore?"

I looked down. "I'm sorry, but Effy didn't really talk much about you."

"You should have known her when she didn't talk at all. Not that I really remember it all that well. Apparently getting hit by a bus isn't all that great for your mental capabilities."

"Just because you're Effy's brother doesn't answer why you know who I am."

He grinned. "Facebook. I know what all of Effy's friends look like." I felt like an idiot, and my cheeks proclaimed my message of shame in bright red. He opened up the door wider and I stepped inside, not totally sure of what I was doing here. He walked into the kitchen and I heard him rummaging through the cabinets. "Would you like something to drink?"

I knew that alcohol was the last thing my body needed, but I couldn't help myself. "Do you have any vodka?"

He didn't reply right away but I heard bottles clinking together as he searched. After about a minute I heard him shout. "Here it is! Knew we had some somewhere. Come on into the kitchen and sit down."

I took a seat across from him. He had already poured out one glass of vodka; I drained it in seconds and slid the glass over towards him for a refill. I remembered as it burned all the way down that I hadn't eaten anything since I woke up.

"You got anything here to eat?" He tossed me a banana. "What the fuck is this?"

He raised one eyebrow. "A banana. Good source of potassium."

_Sarcasm. Fabulous. _I shook my head and began to eat. I chewed slowly, not sure what to say. I had so much trapped inside my head, but I knew he wouldn't care about my problems.

"So why are you here? You didn't even like Effy."

"Of course I did!" I protested, but he wasn't fooled.

"She hit you in the head with a rock." He got up and moved around the table and took a seat so that we were side by side. He lifted his hand and ran his fingers through my hair. "You'll never lose the scar she left." As his fingers traced it I felt something like lightning run through my body, and it seemed as if sparks came from his fingers as they touched my scalp. I shuddered with desire but I leaned my head away, and he pulled his hand back.

"It's probably a good reminder. She was tripping on shrooms and I was being a total bitch to her. I don't love Effy, but we've come to an understanding." I turned my face so that I was looking directly into his.

"It felt good, didn't it?"

I wasn't sure what he meant. "What felt good? The rock? No fucking way!"

He shook his head. "Being a bitch. It felt good. You felt powerful, like no one could ever boss you around." I could only nod. "I used to be an asshole. Not just a jerk, either. I was horrible to my friends, treated them like they were shit. I cheated on my girlfriend with several girls, gave a gay kid head with her in the fucking room, and I even put naked pictures of one girl on her brother's bloody mobile."

The last one made me want to laugh. "That does take a special kind of asshole." I changed tone and tried to sound more serious. "What changed you? You could be putting me on and be faking that you're nice, but it doesn't seem like it."

"I got hit by a bus. I forgot how to do anything. Couldn't write, couldn't sing, and couldn't even get home without help from my friends. Something like that changes you. It at least let me know they still loved me, even when they didn't know it themselves. Why'd you stop being such a bitch?"

"I'd like to say I got hit with a rock, but honestly I was even more of a bitch afterward. My sister sat my fucking exams as me, and I tried to humiliate her at the love ball." I tried to go on, to tell him what was wrong with me, but I couldn't do it. I just started crying again. As I the tears fell, I felt his arm come around my shoulder and he pulled me closer. I let him hold me, realized how warm he felt. It felt so perfect to lean on his chest.

"Where are your friends, Tony? Shouldn't you be with them and not spending your Saturday night with one of your sister's friends you've never met before?"

"I haven't seen my best mate in two years. The idiot hasn't updated facebook in six months or answered his mobile since I sent him to New York."

"But what about the others?"

"Here and there. A couple are in London. Not sure where my old girlfriend is these days but that's for the best probably. Chris died."

The sadness in his voice was familiar, like when Cook talked about Freddie. "My friend is dead too. Freddie. But someone killed him. I don't think he ever realized that I really did love him."

Tony nodded his head like he understood. "He's the guy Effy hit you with the rock over then."

I nodded. "He never loved me like he loved her. He liked me, I think, but when we were fucking he'd just close his eyes. I wanted to believe it was nothing, but I know he was imagining her on top of him. It doesn't matter though, he's dead now and I'm still here, all alone."

"Join the club. I probably started it."

I stared into his eyes and found myself falling into deep blue oceans. "Can we be alone together? Just tonight, can we forget that we're lonely? Please?" My voice broke and I felt pathetic. Tony didn't seem to mind though. He leaned forward and our mouths met. As our tongues touched, a sweet sensation filled my mouth.

"Only tonight."

"I know." And then we kissed again. We made our way upstairs slowly, spending most of our time with our mouths together, pausing every few steps to take off another article of clothing. It wasn't especially efficient, but by the time our bodies hit the bed we had nothing left to remove. He reached to the side of the bed for a condom but I caught his hand. "No."

He gave me an odd look but I shook my head again. "I'll explain later." He shrugged and left it there. He kissed me again on the lips and then the neck, and then a little farther down. He kept going until soon I was arching my back and screaming in pleasure.

I don't know how long we spent on his bed but it must have been hours. If the accident had affected him at all it was impossible to tell. Finally, we lay on our backs and stared at the ceiling. As many times as I've taken drugs, nothing compares to the euphoria of making love, and no one I'd been with could ever compare to Tony.

"It's later." His voice was quiet, almost hard to hear.

"What?"

"You said you'd explain later."

_Shit._ Even though I'd promised him an explanation, I hadn't planned on going into everything. After tonight though, I felt he deserved to know, even if he didn't really care. "I can't have kids." The words were hard to say. I kept hoping that one day I would wake up and that trip to the clinic would never have happened. I'd still be dating that twat and Emily would still be pissed at Naomi for cheating on her. I was smarter than that though. I continued, though at times the words came out haltingly. "I can't ever have kids. No matter what I do. I'm already going through fucking menopause like some shriveled up old prune."

He lay silently for a minute and I began to wonder if he'd drifted off to sleep while I lay my soul bare. He spoke again though and I knew he'd been listening. "That sucks. Honestly, that's probably worse than getting hit by a bus. Even when I'd get scared or angry about forgetting simple things, I still had this thought in the back of my mind that I'd eventually be all better again. But with that. . ." He shook his head.

"What am I supposed to do? I just want to get married and have kids. I want a family! What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing." He smiled sadly. "You'll make a great wife someday."

"But I can't be a mother."

"There's plenty of babies with no Mum or Dad."

Of course. I had been so obsessed with my own problems that I hadn't thought of adoption. I had forgotten just how many parents don't want their children. "It's not fair."

"What?"

"The moms who get to put their children up for adoption. They were perfectly healthy and just decided they didn't want the kid. But I wanted my own kids. I wanted to go through the pain and see them grow up and act stupid in high school and hopefully someday come to love me like I love my parents. Why can't those women have had fucking early menopause instead of me?"

"Life's a bitch. She's not fair. We just have to deal with her the best we can."

I knew he was right. I leaned over and kissed him. "Thank you. For everything."

"Talk to them, Katie."

"Who?"

"Your mates. Don't let them drift away from you. Show them you love them now and they'll always be your friends. You don't have to be lonely if you don't want to."

"Goodbye, Tony."

"Goodbye, Katie."

He smiled and I returned it, and I walked out the bedroom door, slowly gathering my clothes and getting dressed. As I walked outside I pulled out my mobile. It was 6 AM and I had five missed calls from my mum and three from my dad. They would be pissed with me, but they could wait another few minutes. As I started to walk toward home, I dialed another number.

"Katie, what the fuck! It's 2 in the morning here!" Emily sounded groggy and I stifled a laugh.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For being a bitch to you for so long. I always thought it was just because I was afraid I'd lose you to Naomi. Now I think it just hurt knowing you needed her more than me. I know you love me, and I know that you'll always be there for me."

"Katie, anytime you need to talk, you have my number." She yawned. "And while I don't mind waking up in the middle of the night, can you have these personal crises closer to midday next time?"

"I'll do my best."

"Thanks, Katie."

"No problem. Get some sleep and enjoy the rest of your trip. I'll talk to you soon. I love you, Emily."

"I love you too, Katie."

She hung up and I felt free and happy for the first time in months. It'd be impossible to be happy forever, but I knew that no matter what happened my sister and my friends would be there for me, and that made all the difference.


End file.
